Accepting my mistakes chapter four
ACCEPTING – MY – MISTAKES (( 4 ))
Wale came to Nigeria a day before the wedding but I was only able to set my eyes on him on the wedding day. The groom, our intermediary and two other people I’ve never seen in my life, came to our house in the early morning of the wedding day. Wale was somehow different from the picture of him I saw. The pictures look finer than what was standing before me, but all the same, I had no choice, I just had to accept him like that. I know he felt the same way about me but the wedding could not be cancelled anyway, we only had to accept each other just like that. Around 10am, we were at the court to make our marital vows. Only few people I could count on my fingertips came from the groom’s side. The whole ceremony was concluded. I followed my husband to his parent’s house where we had our honey moon. I had suggested he rents a house for me but he insisted his parents wanted us around them. What was supposed to be an honey moon was a blue moon. I was like a stranger in that house. I had no say whatsoever. I was only being tossed by my husband and his parents. The marriage was as if they took me in bondage.My husband stayed in Nigeria for three months. I discovered in the second month that I was pregnant. He promised he would start processing my own papers as soon as possible so I would join him abroad. Well, I was hoping joining him in US would make things better. At least, the ‘wahala’ of her mother would be out of the whole thing. After my husband left the country, my mother-in-law became hostile towards me. To her, there is nothing I could do well. Despite I was pregnant, she was maltreating me. I was like a slave in their house. I wasn’t a dunce either. I was never slack in giving her back hot, whenever she was being inhuman The house became a house of war. When the house could no longer contain the two of us, I went back to my father’s house. That was the option that seemed best to me. In due time, I delivered a baby boy under my parents’ roof. My husband was sending me money to take care of us. Two years passed, nothing was done on getting my papers to go to my husband in US. He was only giving vain promises. I was getting impatient but what would I do? Absolutely nothing!I decided to make it a spiritual warfare. I started going from one prophetto the other. It was in the course of going up and down I discovered my husband already had a wife with kids and are staying together abroad. The parents only wanted him to have another family they could look up to in their neighborhood.I was angry with myself. How could I have been so stupid to fall into such a horrible pit? Two boys for two different men, still, no home I could call my own. I cried ceaselessly but there was nothing I could do to avert the situation.In the quest for a solution, I met Christ. Even though I was a Christian and I was going to Church, I never knew who Christ is. I was only practicing religion, I never understood what salvation is.Well, I got to understand certain things about Christ and Christianity. I discovered and accepted I’ve made some mistakes in the journey of my life.I made a mistake in not disciplining myself and not taking control of my lustful desires. I didn’t think of the repercussion that could come out of sexual immoralities with Kenny.I accept I made a mistake in building a relationship with someone mainlybecause he is based in US. I had thought I would relocate to US and would never have to suffer again in life. Even though I sensed some things were wrong about the relationship but I cared less. I wanted to become a ‘Mrs’ at all cost and I was not wise in making my decisions. You could say it was my mum’s fault but I would not accord the fault to her cos it was my own decision.The greatest of all my mistakes, and the greatest mistake anyone could make in life, including you that is reading my story, is NOT SUBMITTING TO CHRIST.I was a Christian but I did not give my life and totality to Christ. I was living my life my own way and I cared less about the owner of my soul. I rejected the way of Christ and allowed the flesh to rule me.Not following Jesus made the devil to lead me into horrible pits and I suffered for it. I was always crying and I was bitter because of my ignorance of the vices of the Enemy of my soul.Now I know Christ, I know better. I know he wants to be at the edge of affairs of my life. He doesn’t want me to lean on my own understanding in making any decision in life.I’m learning from Him everyday and things are better for me. I have peace of mind, that being in Christ, I have everything, and I have hope.
THE END
Wale came to Nigeria a day before the wedding but I was only able to set my eyes on him on the wedding day. The groom, our intermediary and two other people I’ve never seen in my life, came to our house in the early morning of the wedding day. Wale was somehow different from the picture of him I saw. The pictures look finer than what was standing before me, but all the same, I had no choice, I just had to accept him like that. I know he felt the same way about me but the wedding could not be cancelled anyway, we only had to accept each other just like that. Around 10am, we were at the court to make our marital vows. Only few people I could count on my fingertips came from the groom’s side. The whole ceremony was concluded. I followed my husband to his parent’s house where we had our honey moon. I had suggested he rents a house for me but he insisted his parents wanted us around them. What was supposed to be an honey moon was a blue moon. I was like a stranger in that house. I had no say whatsoever. I was only being tossed by my husband and his parents. The marriage was as if they took me in bondage.My husband stayed in Nigeria for three months. I discovered in the second month that I was pregnant. He promised he would start processing my own papers as soon as possible so I would join him abroad. Well, I was hoping joining him in US would make things better. At least, the ‘wahala’ of her mother would be out of the whole thing. After my husband left the country, my mother-in-law became hostile towards me. To her, there is nothing I could do well. Despite I was pregnant, she was maltreating me. I was like a slave in their house. I wasn’t a dunce either. I was never slack in giving her back hot, whenever she was being inhuman The house became a house of war. When the house could no longer contain the two of us, I went back to my father’s house. That was the option that seemed best to me. In due time, I delivered a baby boy under my parents’ roof. My husband was sending me money to take care of us. Two years passed, nothing was done on getting my papers to go to my husband in US. He was only giving vain promises. I was getting impatient but what would I do? Absolutely nothing!I decided to make it a spiritual warfare. I started going from one prophetto the other. It was in the course of going up and down I discovered my husband already had a wife with kids and are staying together abroad. The parents only wanted him to have another family they could look up to in their neighborhood.I was angry with myself. How could I have been so stupid to fall into such a horrible pit? Two boys for two different men, still, no home I could call my own. I cried ceaselessly but there was nothing I could do to avert the situation.In the quest for a solution, I met Christ. Even though I was a Christian and I was going to Church, I never knew who Christ is. I was only practicing religion, I never understood what salvation is.Well, I got to understand certain things about Christ and Christianity. I discovered and accepted I’ve made some mistakes in the journey of my life.I made a mistake in not disciplining myself and not taking control of my lustful desires. I didn’t think of the repercussion that could come out of sexual immoralities with Kenny.I accept I made a mistake in building a relationship with someone mainlybecause he is based in US. I had thought I would relocate to US and would never have to suffer again in life. Even though I sensed some things were wrong about the relationship but I cared less. I wanted to become a ‘Mrs’ at all cost and I was not wise in making my decisions. You could say it was my mum’s fault but I would not accord the fault to her cos it was my own decision.The greatest of all my mistakes, and the greatest mistake anyone could make in life, including you that is reading my story, is NOT SUBMITTING TO CHRIST.I was a Christian but I did not give my life and totality to Christ. I was living my life my own way and I cared less about the owner of my soul. I rejected the way of Christ and allowed the flesh to rule me.Not following Jesus made the devil to lead me into horrible pits and I suffered for it. I was always crying and I was bitter because of my ignorance of the vices of the Enemy of my soul.Now I know Christ, I know better. I know he wants to be at the edge of affairs of my life. He doesn’t want me to lean on my own understanding in making any decision in life.I’m learning from Him everyday and things are better for me. I have peace of mind, that being in Christ, I have everything, and I have hope.
THE END
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